The big announcement...

I feel like it is ok to finally make this official on here...

This last year has really been a struggle for me musically. Not so much with my actual playing, but with the emotional parts of it, and if you are a musician or understand the ideas behind it then you understand emotions are a huge part of it.

I won't get into all of the nitty gritty details of the struggle, but it did get me thinking about what I would do when I graduated next December. I decided in March that there was no way I would be part of a touring group, or even a symphony that played every day. The Wind Ensemble tour really did me in and showed me that I am not the type of person that can handle something like that. So then I thought, well, I could still go to grad school and teach at the University level. However, I have struggled so long and hard in undergrad and I have really just been torn down a whole lot. It is not that I am giving up, but that is just a fight that I don't want to fight anymore... so that is a no. Then came what I thought was the final option- teaching. I am getting a music education degree, however I wasn't really feeling called to that either.

Hm...

So after much prayer and talking to a few people, I have decided to change my path. When I graduate in December 2010, I will graduate with a BM in Instrumental Performance and Music Education. In either February 2001 or July 2011, I will begin graduate school to receive a M. Div. so that I can do Youth and Young Adult Ministry, focusing on mission and hopefully adding in music.

This is in no way me giving up on my music. But lately I have felt it quickly becoming my job and that is the last thing I want music to be. All of my life, music has been my passion and the absolute love of my life. I didn't need anything else as long as I had my music. When I lost that feeling, I got very scared and knew that something had to happen. I am not saying that I know that this new plan is exactly right, but I definitely feel called in that direction right now.

So there you have it... the whispers are true :)